Sister wants to steal my American boyfriend

September 01, 2022

Dear Pastor,

I am writing to you with tears in my eyes. I am 19 years old and I am living at home with my parents, a brother and a sister who is 21. My sister and I got along very well.

She's very bright and she has her eyes set on university. I would like to go to university too but my father said one will have to help the other because he is unable to send the both of us to university. I have an uncle and he lives in England. I wrote to him and told him what I would like to do and he replied by saying he will do his very best to pay for me. In the meantime, one of my aunts who lives in America came to Jamaica with a missionary team. One of the young men saw me and fell in love with me. I did not have him in mind at all but he talked to me and told me that the moment he saw me, it was love at first sight. We became good friends and spent a lot of time together and then he left. He went back to America and went back to school but we talk every day. He said that he is coming back to Jamaica to marry me. I considered that childish talk because I was not very sure that I liked him.


When I told my sister what was going on, she became jealous and told me to be careful because he may have a girlfriend in America. I agreed with her but as far as I was concerned, if he had a girl in America that did not concern me. I didn't know her and she didn't know me and I was not trying to take this man away from her. But it is my sister who is trying to take him away from me because she told the guy that I am younger than her, and if anybody is to get married, she has to be first. I hate my sister for what she said because she should not stand in my way.

My sister went as far as to lie on me by telling the guy that I had gone out with other guys, which was not true. I am a good Christian girl. I do not do anything that will cause people to look down on me. Even my father became upset with my sister for lying on me to this guy. I cannot trust my sister any more.


Dear B.M.,

Your sister is jealous. She believes that you are going to get ahead of her. But that's not how sisters should live. Sisters should be glad to see each other eventually get to go to college. Your parents have tried but sometimes parents do need some help. Your help is coming in the form of meeting this young man who is in love with you and will do everything possible to help you. Your sister and you should try to live in peace and bury this foolish jealousy.


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