I married this man without knowing his name

November 30, 2021

Dear Pastor,

I am 25 years old and I need your fatherly advice. I am the mother of one child. I got pregnant by the man who married me, but he left me and went away.

He took the marriage certificate with him. I do not even have his correct name. When I met him, he said he was on the island as a tourist. He rented a car and took me everywhere. I invited one of my sisters to go with me. At the hotel, he wanted all three of us to stay in the same room and my sister objected. So he got her her own room and he and I stayed in the other room. That's how he got me pregnant.

He went away and I called him on the number he gave to me and a woman answered. She wanted to know what I wanted. When I asked for him, she said that she was his wife. I told her that I was his wife also. She said he could only have one wife. I called again and no one answered. I called that number many times but never got him. I don't even have a picture of him, but he has pictures of me. I want my son to know his father. I don't want to have anything to do with him.

My sister told me she never trusted him. But, to me, he was a nice guy. I do not want to do anything to hurt him because that would also hurt my son. Please for your advice.


Dear H.B.,

How can a woman marry a man and she does not know his correct name or have photographs of him? I know of women who have married men and the men have given them wrong names. What was the name you got? You seem not to have got any name at all from him. Did he not even give you a nickname? What information do you have?

I know a man who came to Jamaica and met one of our beautiful queens and promised that he would file for her. But he kept coming to Jamaica and spending time with her, but he never put in any papers for her to get that precious green card. Eventually he stopped calling her and stopped coming to Jamaica. He had tied her up with this thing called marriage. But he eventually dumped her and she had to look for another man. He didn't get her pregnant, but this man you have written about got you pregnant. Now the child does not know his father.

Evidently this man was married but he came to Jamaica to have a good time. The hotel in which he stayed should have information on him. Have you checked the hotel? I am not sure they will give you the information they have but at least you can try. Perhaps you need to employ a private investigator who would work on your behalf. Someone has information on that man.

From whom did he rent the car? You need help. I'm telling you that other young women have got into similar problems with men who have come to Jamaica and have fooled them and they cannot be found. I can only tell you I am really sorry to hear about your dilemma. I repeat, however, that you should go and consult a private investigator to help you track this man down. But, it is not going to be easy.


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