I want to stay with my HIV-positive girlfriend


November 25, 2015

Dear Pastor,

I am from the Corporate Area. I have been with my girlfriend for almost six years. I met her while I was at work one evening.

Two years ago, we had a baby girl but, before that, we always had unprotected sex.

Pastor, three months into the pregnancy when she had to do her check-up, she found she was HIV positive. She got the call from the health centre that morning. I was on my way home from work.

She called me and said she had something important to tell me. I said, OK.

After the conversation ended, I was wondering what it could be. I was so happy about the baby, I wasn't thinking anything negative.

When I got home that morning, I realised there was some tension in the house. She started crying and said she had received a call from the health centre that there was something wrong with her blood. I started to stare at her immediately, in shock. I asked her what was wrong. She said she doesn't know.

At this time, pastor, I was a fool to what was going on. I didn't know she had found out, about three years before we met, that she was HIV positive. At least, that was what she said. We both cried together and I was wondering if I was the person who had passed it to her.

We went to the health centre located in Kingston the same day. On our way, I was praying to God that it was something other than AIDS or HIV.

When we got to the health centre, she went and did another test. I went and did one. When we got the results, mine came back negative and hers positive.

That day, I promised her that I would stay with her regardless of her, situation because, pastor, I really love this woman.

Recently I noticed some changes in her behaviour, only to find out she is having a relationship with another guy. I am not sure if they are sexually involved but they are together. I really love this girl, and would love to spend the rest of my life with her. I really need your advice.


Dear J.B.,

Something is not right here. If your girlfriend found out, three years ago, she is HIV positive, and didn't tell you, she was not trustworthy and should not have been having unprotected sex with you or any other person. She is not only careless, she is wicked and presumptuous.

She is clearly not a good woman, but I am not sure you are telling me the story straight because I do not see how you can know now what is going on, and be in love with her, unreservedly. I am not saying it cannot happen but I know, for sure, that this woman is iniquitous because she knows her condition, yet she never told you and now she has established another intimate relationship.

What is the problem? Is it that she is against men and she has decided to spread this virus around? I am afraid I cannot encourage you to continue in this relationship. However, if you are determined you should, you should go and see a medical doctor.


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